I've been writing about autumn arriving, even when it's 80 degrees out and I'm faking it in a tank top. But there's another autumn I've been thinking about lately. Not the one on the calendar. The one that happens inside a woman's body.

In Chinese medicine, our lives move through the same seasons nature does. And a woman's body keeps time in seven-year chapters. Around 7, we lose our baby teeth and start to grow up. At 14, our cycle begins and we step into our fertile years. Through our 20s, we're in full summer, our reproductive prime.

Then around 35, the body begins to turn. By 42 the shift is easy to feel. And at 49, right about on schedule, the monthly cycle completes and menopause arrives.

That whole stretch, from roughly 35 to 49, is autumn, the Metal element season. You might know it by another name: perimenopause, the years of change that carry us into menopause. In Chinese medicine, perimenopause is simply the body moving into a new season.

I'm on the other side of it now, and I've come to see these years differently than the way we're often told to.

The common story is decline. Your body is falling apart, and you'd better fix it before it does. Chinese medicine tells it differently. Autumn isn't a breakdown. It's a recalibration. It's the harvest. It's the season where a woman finally comes into her own.

Here's what autumn actually does in nature. The trees pull their sap inward. They drop their leaves. Not because something is wrong, but because you cannot carry everything into winter. You keep what's essential and you let the rest fall away.

That's the Metal element, and that's exactly what this season of life asks of us. Metal is discernment. It's the ability to look at everything you've gathered over the years and get honest: what do I actually want to carry forward, and what have I been holding onto out of habit? What's a real yes, and what's finally a no?

That's not a small thing. It's some of the most powerful work a woman does.

And yes, there can be grief in it. Grief is the emotion tied to the Lungs, the organ of the Metal element, and letting go often comes with a little of it. If grief shows up, that's a sign it mattered. You grieve the things you cared about. That isn't a problem to fix. It's part of releasing something with respect.

The point I come back to

If you want to support the letting go this season asks for, here's a simple pairing I reach for. Take LI4, called Hegu, or "Joining Valley," in the webbing between your thumb and first finger. It belongs to the Large Intestine, the organ of release in the Metal pair.

Apply a drop of cypress, a grounding oil long connected with moving through change, hold the point on both hands, and take a few slow breaths. Let it settle in. Simple, and it does real work.

For the practitioners reading this: this is a beautiful one to offer the women in your care who are moving through these years and feeling the weight of everything they carry.

You're not falling apart

If you're somewhere in your own autumn right now, I want you to hear this. You are not falling apart. You are refining. You're deciding what's worth keeping and what you're finally allowed to set down. That isn't the end of anything. It's you, coming into your power.